by Grania
Okay, it probably doesn’t qualify as the world’s most Sophisticated Theology, but this caused a great deal of snickering in Ireland today. The leaflet apparently is the work of a Christian group campaigning against Ireland’s imminent referendum on same-sex marriage. They had virtually no hope of stopping the inevitable even before this page started hitting the streets and then trending on social media, as there is an extremely comfortable margin of support for it. Now they probably have even less.
Such heartfelt pleas immediately launched an appropriately-named, harmless, but possibly NSFW hashtag on Twitter and is getting roundly mocked everywhere.
Possibly my favorite:
It is sad that some people still think their religion mandates homophobia, but heartening that the general reaction to religious bigotry in Ireland today is laughter.
sub
Hmmm…they are so against exposing children to anything even tangentially sodomy related that they took a picture of cute, innocent children and wrote the word “Sodomy” in giant letters right next to them. Then printed a up a whole bunch of copies. :-p
That was my reaction too. American Christians object to a child on billboard about atheism, but this is OK.
It reminds me very much of the Seventh Day Adventist cover story pretty much canonizing all the children who died because of their sick religion.
To give credit where credit is due, Jehovah’s Witnesses publish “Awake!”
There’s a Simon and Garfunkel joke here somewhere…
Oh, it’s there already.
https://twitter.com/eveirecarolina/status/552217987051421697
Hahahaha!
Great, now I’m thinking about how sodomy sounds.
A whole lot of grunting and groaning I should imagine. Basically the same as hetero rumpy-pumpy, but far more evil, obviously.
All base, no treble.
So what you’re saying is, bassically, only lower frequencies?
Ooh, I wonder if they have a different spectrum after a fourier transform?
I think this discussion is going off bass.
Possibly. Still, it’s an interesting idea. Maybe I’ll make a PhD project of it.
That’s the treble with these sorts of things.
b&
Oh dear. I hope we haven’t altoed this beyond all recognition.
I do detect a slightly different tenor from how things began.
Le viola! Theme and variations on death and transfiguration….
b&
Well, ‘cello, Ben!
(I may revisit this thread in the morning and realize my contributions barely qualify as amusing, but with a could of glasses of wine in me I’ve got a serious case of the chuckles.)
Alto y’all to cut it out…
These puns are getting increasingly forced. I don’t think I can baritone more minute.
Well played! Or shall I say “sung”?
Bravo, very sharp!
I’m running out of ideas, may have to resort to organ jokes.
Perhaps it should be allowed to end on a high note?
Base? Team Unicorn can help!
Funny! Our Guyanese friends, whom we had dinner with last night, were telling us about hearing the original at a NY’s Eve party. All about the Bass (not the treble), with plenty of double entendres. I had/have never heard it.
PPP think I had heard it but didn’t think about it until I saw the Team Unicorn parody.
Ugh thanks again iPad. “PPP” is “I”. How’d that happen?
There was supposed to be an ear-splitting boom!
b&
Ugh so 80s. Also awful.
And also ear-splitting, as promised!
b&
Quick, Diana, we need that squirrel face-palm photo of yours. Or was it a chipmunk?
It’s a chipmunk. 🙂
http://whyevolutionistrue.files.wordpress.com/2014/08/270a6606.jpeg?w=948&h=698
Yeah, that’s it! Thanks; no words needed here.
A Rick Santorum speech.
Evidently from the picture, it sounds like a church bell ringing. Oh, the irony. 🙂
I say the JREF poses a challenge to the Irish RCC. They can listen to the wedding bells from 20 weddings 5-10 of which will be gay weddings. If they can identify which weddings are gay and which are straight based on the bell ringing, getting all 20 weddings correct, we’ll acknowledge there may be something to their “sounds of sodomy” complaint.
Ear plugs for children! pack of 10, order now!
Immediately, I thought of Ross Perot and his opposition to NAFTA, in which he warned of a “giant sucking sound” draining U.S. jobs.
So…they want the kids in the hands of the priests where they can properly be exposed to the sounds of sodomy?
What a bunch of sick fucks.
b&
Right. Why don’t they also print posters asking whether children should be exposed to the sounds (and pain) of children being raped by priests?
Maybe they don’t find it necessary to do that because, as Hitch once stated and quoted the Pontiff in a debate, children have already received that “pastoral loving care.”
Until the Church hands over all its records on priestly rape to the relevant police with jurisdictional authority, Catholics especially have no moral high ground whatsoever to argue from.
After the Church stops sheltering the child rapists in its ranks, we can discuss what it would take for them to regain something resembling moral respectability. But until then? Not a prayer.
b&
In-fucking-deed.
The claim that believing in (a) god reliably produces better behavior than not believing is borne out by ZERO religions, current or historic.
If anything, the correlation goes the other way.
Of course sounds below 135Db won’t hurt, but sodomy by an Irish priest does.
How does the ‘sounds of sodomy’ differ from the sounds of ‘ordinary’ sex?
Not only gays do it, you know.
Would it be okay if they promised to be, well, quiet about it?
That would be an interesting addition to the legislation! I wonder how they’d word that one?
And does it apply to straights who indulge in sodomy? Are gays who don’t – are they therefore OK? I guess that’s progress!
Probably they think the acts are bad for straights and gays are just really really extra bad. 🙂
… and badass.
I tend to think that the word, “sodomy,” in the minds of Christians, just means, “any sex act I personally find icky.” Seems the thriftiest theory.
b&
Yeah, that’s probably pretty accurate.
Quiet…you mean some kind of muffler?
I think sodomy applies to both hetero and homosexual relations – at least if the laws are to be read that way.
The difference is the wailing and gnashing of teeth from christians every time an act of sodomy occurs.
And, by the way, sodomy is any kind of sexual activity other than straight, hetero, missionary position intercourse lasting no more time than necessary (on the order of 60 seconds), and in the course of which if the man accidently enjoys himself, oh well try and do better next time, but if the woman does she is a slut.
Maybe not the legal definition, though I’ve seen some that come very close to that, but a conservative christian definition.
“Men that God made mad,
for all their wars are merry,
and all their songs are sad.”
to which we must add
“and all their sounds are sloppy.”
…and slurry…
So is it the case then that Christians make a point of teaching their kids what heterosexual screwing sounds like? Or is that just done by this particular subset of Christians? Jebus! Thinking of the individuals that were harmed by child abuse within the Church, the laughter gets stuck in my throat though. What a bunch of f*ckwits.
From what I can tell from the picture the “sounds of sodomy” are made by a great big red bell. There even seems to be hand grasping a handle beneath it, ready to toll the music of the gay.
That’s intriguing and quite mysterious. I didn’t know they used bells. At certain times, perhaps indicating a new ritual stage of sodomy? Or constantly? Can you substitute a gong? A triangle? Why let children in on this before the general public? It sounds exciting.
…and does the bell go, “ding,” as well as, “dong”…?
b&
It seems to go ding-a-ling-a-ling.
Oh, Rudy!
b&
Oh, man. I had totally forgotten about that song! Amazing that the great Chuck Berry sang it, but then Sinatra did the rubber tree plant one…damn, now I’ve got two competing, horrible earworms:-(
Sadder still, “My Ding-A-Ling” was Chuck Berry’s only number 1 hit.
Sad, but not surprising, I guess🙀
I think it makes the sound of church bells to shelter people from the act. 🙂
Or, maybe it’s just Clarence?
b&
In that case, why have anglican churches developed elaborate forms of change ringing while catholics haven’t really done much in that direction?
I think the most parsimonious hypothesis is that the bells are to help the parties involved keep time, and because anglicans harbour somewhat less anti – gay prejudice they’ve been able to explore the tradition more fully.
Ha ha! The gonging sounds of gay sodomy sex!
Gonging dongs?
I guess that makes bell choir particpants “swingers.”
And ooh, did you know the Smiths down the street supposedly hold carillons?
… go Steadman.
“You can ring my be-e-e-ll, ring my bell…”
Ireland, where men are men and sheep are mighty nervous.
That’s a very broad brush stroke…it’s county Letrim
indeed, if one can distinguish theh sounds of sodomy from good ol’ hetero sex, someone has a LOT of experience. 🙂
I was just wondering how the hell children would know the difference.
This is all so pathetic and anal!
…and your confidence on the subject stems from…?
b&
hah! 🙂 Heck, I’ve spent weeks at camping events with thousands of very odd people in tents. If I can’t, then who can? 🙂
You don’t mean…Pensacola bible camp?
🙂 Nah, though that would be the place. I’m talking about the Pennsic War, a rather odd gathering of the Society for Creative Anachronism, a group that sort of recreates the Middle Ages. If you aren’t familiar, it’s like Woodstock, a science fiction convention, and a military reenactment all at once.
Uhm…their religion does mandate homophobia.
When I first saw the title of the post, I thought maybe it was a link to this:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/we-must-do-everything-we-can-for-the-children-vs-c,11557/
But here is progress:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatoon/saskatoon-gay-couple-1st-to-be-married-in-mennonite-church-1.2888826
I embiggened the picture enough to read the small print. In the first line, “christian” isn’t capitalized.
Blasphemers!
Does anyone like the sounds of their parents having sex?
Don’t know why the close italics tag after anyone didn’t work.
My parents had never sex.
Just on the news today – Florida becomes the 36th state to legalize same sex marriage. So Ireland says, we don’t like the sound of that.
Yay, FL!
Are american aware of the Eurovision? Or its relation to #SoundsOfSodomy?
I do know about Eurovision but have, thankfully I assume,, never heard of Song of Sodomy.
This was a fairly cheap publication, however I get Alive the catholic newspaper pushed through my door every month. It’s a free newspaper but must cost a bit to publish. It is full of conspiracy theories about the liberal media in Ireland.
Of course the only type of sex allowed is the John Paul II method
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vZKEyCfZe8
Toooo funny! 1,2,3 in…
Just glancing at the poster, one could assume this is a call to protect children from priests. That’s the bigger risk took kids.
Have these people actually figured out exactly what sodomy sounds like?
Grania: I thought Ireland had a referendum on this ages ago (3-5 years back?) When the Sinead’s HandSinead’s Hand video advert came out (which I think is brilliant.)
Is this a repeat referendum? I’m afraid I’ve forgotten the history on this.
cut/paste fail, apologies.
I’m sorry, I am not sure which referendum you are referring to. Ireland has had civil partnerships available to same-sex couples since 2011 but the referendum (required by the constitution) to change the current Marriage law is only happening in May.
It was felt that there would be legal challenges to a change in legislation. Some people from a certain well funded lobby group might bring a legal challenge. Leading eventually to a referendum. So to short cut all of that they decided to run a referendum but then chose to leave out the referendum on removing blasphemy and instead include one on lowering the age you can become president of Ireland.
Another good video is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wopoEJxFYQw
Everyone else here seems to have the whole homophobia creepy child photo angle covered. So I want to comment on this: “For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say.” WTF does that have to do with anything? Admittedly Christianity goes right by me. But why all of a sudden has the story broken off into the Holy Spirit, Cyrano-like, feeding you lines? I assume it isn’t going to tell you what to say so you can sing along with the 🎶 Sounds of Sodomy. 🎶 Just more evidence that Christianity has too many characters/*cough* gods in it. Congrats on an anticipated good outcome in Ireland. 🙂