Chuckle of the day, but also sad

Reader Paul sent me this article from Canada’s National Post (click on screenshot to read it), noting that it was “not from The Onion, but real Canadian news.” It has to be real because even The Onion couldn’t make up stuff like this:

Get this:

A B.C. couple whose religious views are too extreme even for churches and pastors and put them at odds with family, doctors, social workers and anyone else trying to help them with their daughter, have lost their battle for custody of her.

The unusual child custody trial featured the couple speaking in tongues to a stuffed animal they said transmitted the word of God directly to them and refusing legal assistance because Jesus Christ — through the stuffed lion — was their lawyer, witness and judge.

Aslan! Here’s what else they did:

After the woman found she was pregnant, she told a social worker her husband sometimes choked her to make her stop crying, had once tied her hands and covered her mouth with tape, which scared her, and occasionally beat her, court heard.

She told the worker her husband grew up in a cult and believes sexual relations between children should be encouraged and that they “role-play” sins where she plays the victim and he plays the perpetrator, court heard.

But wait! There’s more:

After the birth of their daughter, the parents refused all medical tests and procedures for her, including a hearing test, blood test, eye drops and a vitamin K shot. The mother also said she was unwilling to have her vaccinated.

Because of concerns over family violence and mental health, the ministry monitored the family. The couple refused to have parental capacity assessments, despite a court order.

A month after the girl’s birth, she was removed from the home and the parents continued to have supervised access.

The mother applied to change her daughter’s name to Jesus JoyoftheLord and her own first name to Risen Lord Jesus, her middle name to Refinersfire and her last name to Christ (with a hyphenation including her real name.)

When their child custody case came to court, the couple refused legal aid.

They said they had legal help, however, which came in the formed of a stuffed lion. During trial, the couple spoke to the lion in non-discernible words, presented as “speaking in tongues,” and said that through the lion they heard directly from God.

They said Jesus Christ was their “lawyer, witness and judge.”

When they cross-examined witnesses, they told each witness that their lawyer Jesus was asking the questions through them.

The couple was apparently unstable, moving around, unable to hold jobs, and even disrupting the Christian churches they attended with their extreme behavior.

If they had been less demonstrative, of course, the kid would still be with them. And that’s the real tragedy of such situations: you can fill your kid’s head with all kinds of lies, fantasies, and false nonsense, but as long as you don’t make a public scene, that’s fine. There should be a law forbidding that brainwashing. As for withholding medical care and vaccinations, I suppose that that’s legal in some parts of Canada, as it is in many states in the U.S. And THAT should be illegal. The suffering and killing of children by withholding medical care in favor of “spiritual treatment” is one of the most horrible aspects of evangelical Christianity.

The judge found the parents unfit and ruled that the child should remain in foster care. Eventually, this could lead to its being adopted. It should be; people like the ones above (why aren’t their names given?) are unfit to be parents. Without religion, of course, the chances of this happening are severely reduced, though not completely eliminated.

44 Comments

  1. RavingRationality
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 8:49 am | Permalink

    “Why aren’t their names given?”

    Likely to protect the identity of their child.

    • Torbjörn Larsson
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:07 am | Permalink

      Why would their names be given?

      This happens in the US, rarely here with the exception of public personalities sometimes “when there is public interest”.

      So I am at a loss what use would it have. The offender is found innocent or given a punishment, in either case my interest would be null and void. In fact I rather not know, unless it is a repeat offender.

      • Torbjörn Larsson
        Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:08 am | Permalink

        Oy. “At a loss what use would it have” – at a loss what use it would have.

        • infiniteimprobabilit
          Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:16 am | Permalink

          That’s all right. We can just imagine “At a loss what use would it have” spoken with a slight Scandinavian accent which I, for one, find rather pleasant. 😉

          cr

          • infiniteimprobabilit
            Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:17 am | Permalink

            But I do agree with your point.

            cr

      • Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:57 am | Permalink

        Yes it happens here because trials are public. For a reason.

    • JezGrove
      Posted June 9, 2018 at 2:18 pm | Permalink

      In the original article it is made clear that the decision not to name the parents was indeed to protect the identity of the child.

  2. Randall Schenck
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:07 am | Permalink

    What the media should be doing is covering this thing in great numbers, on TV, newspapers and of course the internet. Always we see very little coverage of the religious crazies. Just more apologists, keep quiet and maybe it will go away.

    Of course, after the latest from this creep Giuliani and what he said publicly about Stormy Daniels, he is possibly worse than Trump. So these religious nuts are just part of the noise.

    • Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:14 am | Permalink

      In the UK this would have happened in a family court & we would probably never hear about it. Not a good thing…

      • Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:06 am | Permalink

        It *did* happen in a family court and we wouldn’t have heard about it except the parent appealed the family court decision to the “Provincial Court of British Columbia”. I don’t know the Canadian court system, but I assume that is similar to a federal district court here. Those trials are public here and I assume (because we’re hearing about it) there as well.

  3. Ken Pidcock
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:15 am | Permalink

    There should be a law forbidding that brainwashing.

    The only ways I can imagine such a law being enforced are, to say the least, unpalatable to me.

  4. Ken Kukec
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:18 am | Permalink

    Speakin’ of Canadian chuckles, I see the Donald has blamed Canada for burning the White House during the War of 1812.

    Build a wall, Canucks, and make us pay for it. Hurry, before it’s too late.

    • Randall Schenck
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:25 am | Permalink

      See, you just haven’t been getting your history from the proper source. Why not get it from someone who never read a book in his life. The Canadians and Mexico are going to make us pay big time for this tariff crap. Obviously his brain is absent of economics as well as history.

      • infiniteimprobabilit
        Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:39 am | Permalink

        Well, just to counter The Trump, (and linked off the same page of the National press) is this Ontario candidate:

        cr

        • BJ
          Posted June 7, 2018 at 8:21 pm | Permalink

          That’s great. I wouldn’t vote for Zod, but Luthor would probably be a horizontal move if we elected him President.

          • Earl Scott Nicholson
            Posted June 8, 2018 at 9:59 pm | Permalink

            In the late 90’s there was a story in the comics where Luthor WAS elected President!

          • Zetopan
            Posted June 10, 2018 at 1:57 pm | Permalink

            Excepting that Lex Luthor was actually smart, unlike our “stable genius” liar in chief.

    • James Walker
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 5:30 pm | Permalink

      Not to worry, if the polls are to believed, Ontario will have its own version of Trump as Premier in a few hours … 😦

  5. Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:26 am | Permalink

    Unfortunately, unless these parents are too old to have more children, they probably will have them. In which case, this scenario will
    be played out again unless they can get far enough away from civilization to escape the law.

    • Posted June 10, 2018 at 9:35 am | Permalink

      I thought the same, that authorities will most likely have to take away other children.

  6. JonLynnHarvey
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:26 am | Permalink

    The medical safety of the public and of children should always trump/eclipse religious freedom.

    “Spirituality is no excuse” is the title for a good skeptic blog that I just discovered yesterday. “https://spiritualityisnoexcuse.wordpress.com”

  7. Martin X
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:32 am | Permalink

    I’m always amazed that crazy people are able to find a spouse that’s compatible with their craziness. There truly is someone for everyone.

    • Randall Schenck
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:55 am | Permalink

      You bet. About 40% for Trump.

    • Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:08 am | Permalink

      Sometimes the craziness is imposed.

  8. Blue
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 9:56 am | Permalink

    in re “that’s the real tragedy of
    such situations,” also a n y goddyness !
    a n y supernaturalness ! that is,
    a l l religions which … …
    “fill your kid’s head with
    all kinds of lies, fantasies, and
    false nonsense.”

    ELIMINATE and END SUCH CHILD INCULCATION.

    Blue

    • Blue
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:22 am | Permalink

      cuuuuz how different from these two parents
      is this of today’s ( literally = t o d a y’s )
      “lesson” to parents by this priest !

      http://www.stanthonydsm.org/worship/pastors-corner——-/trust-in-god.html

      “At the altar of our Lord, at Mass, we get Jesus when we receive Jesus. We lean toward God, and he leans right back. Everyone needs to relearn the simple lesson that many of our young people know; they need Jesus. At the Mass they get Jesus no matter how bad life gets. Jesus is always here for us. We can trust Him.

      A young girl with A MENTAL DISABILITY [ Blue ]
      made her First Communion during a beautiful celebration of the Mass. After the ceremony, her uncle said to her mother, “What a
      beautiful liturgy. The sad thing is that she didn’t understand anything.” The child overheard this remark and said to her
      mommy, “Don’t worry Mommy, Jesus loves me just as I am.” Yes, Jesus loves us just as we are, disabled and handicapped. We are disabled by our sins, by our lack of faith, by our failure to trust in God.

      We are disabled by troubles, struggles, losses, temptations and tribulations. We are crippled by a lukewarm faith, which we pass on to our children. We are all disabled and handicapped by our own cowardice. Few of us would have the courage to die for Christ as Cassie Bern all had. We are all disabled, handicapped and crippled by the fact that we really don’t understand how much Jesus loves us, just as we are. But He is not happy to see us disabled. He wants us healed.

      From the cross Jesus cries out, “Come to me even though you don’t recognize the need. You
      need me more than the air you breathe. Come, trust in me. Do not let your hearts be troubled.” Those words of young Matt Baker should be burned into our hearts, “If we lean toward God, we know he’s going to lean right back. The only way you’ll get through this is through Jesus. If you don’t have Jesus, get Jesus. You don’t know if you have tomorrow.”
      The next time you are in line to receive Communion, recapture the faith of the young people.

      Tell Him, “Jesus I need you. Jesus I trust you. Amen.” (Excerpt from “Cross My Heart and Hope to Live” by Monsignor Chiodo.)”

      Seems to me to be … … The Same.
      The Same Crazed – ness. Today’s “lesson”
      about which I see no difference from
      this couple’s behavior inside
      a 21st Century courtroom.

      Truly: ELIMINATE & END C R A Z E D
      child inculcation.

      Blue

  9. Matt
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:04 am | Permalink

    Reminds me of a Sam Harris quote.

    “The president of the United States has claimed, on more than one occasion, to be in dialogue with God. If he said that he was talking to God through his hairdryer, this would precipitate a national emergency. I fail to see how the addition of a hairdryer makes the claim more ridiculous or offensive.”
    ― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

  10. BJ
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:08 am | Permalink

    Jesus Christ!

    I sounds less like they’re very religious people and more like they’re two severely mentally ill people who found each other. Still, that’s quite the story, and I can imagine a very amusing dark comedy wherein the first act ends with that courtroom scene.

    • infiniteimprobabilit
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:25 am | Permalink

      Yes, my thoughts exactly.

      (I seem to be agreeing with BJ rather a lot. So far as I know I haven’t got multiple personality syndrome and BJ isn’t my alter ego 😉

      Re that couple, I’m not sure whether to laugh or cry. My first impulse is to laugh hysterically, much like the gentry in the 18th century used to visit asylums to laugh at the inmates; and then I feel all guilty about it.

      cr

      • BJ
        Posted June 7, 2018 at 4:37 pm | Permalink

        “I seem to be agreeing with BJ rather a lot. So far as I know I haven’t got multiple personality syndrome and BJ isn’t my alter ego”

        In case you ever doubted it, I can now assure you that you are a great person and will be very successful in life!

        • Zetopan
          Posted June 10, 2018 at 2:03 pm | Permalink

          Just send me your credit card details to ensure that happens.

    • Desnes Diev
      Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:48 am | Permalink

      I am generally not in favor of extreme measures but, imho, the second act should involve a surgeon specialized in gonadectomies and his merry staff.

      • Kev
        Posted June 7, 2018 at 12:18 pm | Permalink

        A merry staff? Isn’t that what Robin Hood hits the Sheriff of Nottingham’s head with?

    • Posted June 10, 2018 at 9:37 am | Permalink

      I thought the same: basic problem here is mental illness rather than religion.

  11. Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:17 am | Permalink

    I’m sorry, did you just call your attorney a “lion bastard”?

    (I’ll see myself out)

  12. DW
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 10:52 am | Permalink

    PLOT TWIST: Stuffed lion gave out better legal advice than most internet forums.

  13. Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:29 am | Permalink

    I would be proud to have such a handsome stuffed Lion as a lawyer. And the sanest one in the bunch.

  14. Mark Sturtevant
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:41 am | Permalink

    Holy mother of god.
    It was not before possible to consider a case for forced sterilization. Not until now.

  15. Posted June 7, 2018 at 11:49 am | Permalink

    I sense several generations of victims …

  16. DrBrydon
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 12:04 pm | Permalink

    Praise-God Barebone would be proud.

  17. rom
    Posted June 7, 2018 at 6:27 pm | Permalink

    In defense of BC and lack of religiosity

    http://vancouversun.com/news/staff-blogs/b-c-breaks-records-when-it-comes-to-religion-and-the-lack-thereof

  18. Diane G
    Posted June 8, 2018 at 4:40 am | Permalink

    sub


%d bloggers like this: