Caturday felid: Moggie caught smuggling contraband into jail

It’s not the cat’s fault, for cats are neither moral nor immoral; just solipsistic. And of course you can’t train them to do anything correctly.

According to the Guardian, a hapless moggie was used in a smuggling scheme in Brazil, but was apprehended before delivery of the loot:

Prison guards caught a cat carrying a mobile phone and a saw trying to walk through prison gates in north-east Brazil, it has emerged.

The guards saw the white cat walking towards them with tape wrapped around its back and stomach. When they looked closer they saw the cat was also carrying drills, an earphone, a memory card, batteries and a phone charger.

All 263 detainees in the prison of Arapiraca, a city of 215,000 people in the state of Alagoas, are considered suspects in the plot, which is being investigated by local police.

“It’s tough to find out who’s responsible for the action as the cat doesn’t speak,” a prison official told local paper Estado de S Paulo.

The cat was taken to an animal disease centre to receive medical care. The incident took place on New Year’s Day but was first reported by national media on Saturday.

Now who would think that a cat could find the right person in prison?

Here’s a video of the cat being disarmed.  Note that it is not “white,” but black and white—a tuxedo cat.  The Guardian (and the BBC in the video below) has abjured journalistic accuracy. Can’t they see the cat?

I like the last line uttered by an official: “It’s tough to find out who’s responsible for the action, as the cat doesn’t speak.”

Here’s the loot it was carrying. The drillbits I can understand, but are those wooden nail files? What use would they be in prison?


Dave Letter man did a “Top Ten,” based on this incident, and you can watch the video on the CBS site: “The top ten signs your cat is up to no good.”  A screenshot:

Picture 1

h/t: Matthew Cobb, Reginald Selkirk, Ginger K.


  1. Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:18 am | Permalink

    The detainees deserve a grade E for effort and ingenuity 🙂

  2. Jon
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:32 am | Permalink

    That’s funny. (I think those are hack saw blades broken in half.)

    • Posted January 12, 2013 at 8:14 am | Permalink

      I agree…hacksaw blades.. they’re just painted yellow.

      • MadScientist
        Posted January 12, 2013 at 2:43 pm | Permalink

        They make great knives so they’ll be valuable in a jail even if they’re of no use as saws.

        • Yossarian
          Posted January 12, 2013 at 9:21 pm | Permalink

          Yep, I can guarantee they are hacksaw blades, and they’re actually pretty strong ones, as I recently bought a pair of that exact same brand and type. While I don’t think they’d stand much chance against metal (not that it matters, considering our jails here in Brazil), they’re definitely a good weapon.

  3. Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:55 am | Permalink

    Is it just me, or was every laugh after each of Letterman’s lines exactly the same?


    • John Scanlon, FCD
      Posted January 12, 2013 at 11:42 am | Permalink

      It’s getting so hard to buy a reliable studio audience these days.

  4. Hempenstein
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:56 am | Permalink

    Those yellow pieces look like hacksaw blades, broken in half.

  5. guilherme21msa
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:59 am | Permalink

    I don’t think those a wooden nail files, I think they are metal files. They are used for sharpening the ends of toothbrushes to make improvised stabbing weapons.

    • MadScientist
      Posted January 12, 2013 at 2:58 pm | Permalink

      The files themselves can be sharpened when they’ve dulled and they make great stabbing weapons too. I guess the advantage of a toothbrush handle is that it doesn’t trip the metal detector.

    Posted January 12, 2013 at 7:08 am | Permalink

    I feel very sorry for the cat…..the knife blade was very close to causing a surgery & I know the removal of duct tape had to hurt….

  7. Posted January 12, 2013 at 7:12 am | Permalink

    They’re not nail files or metal files – they’re Starrett hack saw blades designed to cut through steel.

  8. Kevin Alexander
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 7:37 am | Permalink

    “It’s tough to find out who’s responsible for the action, as the cat doesn’t speak.”

    Have they tried waterboarding the cat?

    • suwise3
      Posted January 12, 2013 at 7:50 am | Permalink

      “Point out the guy who put you up to this, and get a can of tuna” would have worked faster.

      • Sarah
        Posted January 12, 2013 at 5:45 pm | Permalink

        You can’t expect a cat to be a stool pigeon.

    • Notagod
      Posted January 12, 2013 at 9:28 am | Permalink

      Little Bush’s god would have commanded him to.

  9. Posted January 12, 2013 at 8:20 am | Permalink

    There’s a funny book out called “How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You”. So far, it has a 4-star rating at Amazon.

  10. Posted January 12, 2013 at 8:35 am | Permalink

    Cats… pff, never liked them. Criminal everyone of them 🙂

  11. Torbjörn Larsson, OM
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 11:38 am | Permalink

    No doubt you have had many emails on this. But this cat burglar featured in the comments already Jan 5: .

    Let us agree that Letterman can’t beat this web site on cat news.

  12. Reginald Selkirk
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 12:06 pm | Permalink

    For next week

    • still learning
      Posted January 12, 2013 at 1:33 pm | Permalink

      A great example of prestidigiCATation…

  13. kevinj
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 12:43 pm | Permalink

    in not dissimilar news. A cat has also been captured by Japanese police seeking information about a hacker.

    clearly this is the first stages in a plan to take over the world. First a couple of careful tests to make sure that even if caught they are considered innocent and then the takeover begins.

  14. MadScientist
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 2:56 pm | Permalink

    The cat may not speak, but that doesn’t mean they can’t get a confession.

  15. Scote
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 3:57 pm | Permalink

    Mistreatment and miss reporting of a moggie. Those look like hacksaw blades cut in half not nail files.

  16. ppnl
    Posted January 13, 2013 at 2:50 pm | Permalink

    But the cat was cool and never said a mumblen word…

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