Hurricane Sandy? No worries, folks!

That is not moving naturalism forward.

65 Comments

  1. Douglas E
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:17 pm | Permalink

    Lordy, I hope you are not a Twitter follower of LL! :-)

    • Frank
      Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:27 pm | Permalink

      But I can only imagine how many people are followers! I think you can make a case that this phenomenon is a true sign of the apocalypse. Never has there been such an efficient way for exceedingly stupid people to reach out to (and influence!) each other. Kim Kardashian as the anti-Christ?

      • Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:29 pm | Permalink

        You don’t have to imagine, you can go to Twitter to find out! (Or let someone else; it’s 4,525,094. Or < 0.2% of Internet users.)

        /@

  2. Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:22 pm | Permalink

    So…your brain hurts from the workshop and you want us all to share your pain, so you’re inflicting a twit’s twit upon us?

    Not fair! Now my brain hurts, too!

    b&

    • whyevolutionistrue
      Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:24 pm | Permalink

      Ben’s take is correct, and no, I am not a follower of LL (normally I wouldn’t deign to respond to that nefarious accusation).

      • Douglas E
        Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:27 pm | Permalink

        Nothing nefarious intended since it would seem clear to all here that that would not be the case!

      • Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:28 pm | Permalink

        On a serious note…are you going to be able to make it to Mexico on time? Boston is taking something of a beating right now, as I understand….

        b&

    • JohnnieCanuck
      Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:27 pm | Permalink

      Looks like our host believes that misery shared is misery halved. Either that or he just wanted company in his misery.

      Pedantically speaking, that was a twit’s tweet.

      • Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:30 pm | Permalink

        Considering the subject (and verb) at hand, I think most any vowel would provide a suitable substitute….

        b&

    • Dominic
      Posted October 30, 2012 at 2:58 am | Permalink

      David Cameron said “many a twitter makes a twat” but Twitter is useful… or maybe I am a twat!

  3. MaryL
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:23 pm | Permalink

    I don’t care who actually posted that, it’s a hurricane! It’s dangerous. I’ve been through a direct hit and that’s damned frightening.

    • JohnnieCanuck
      Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:32 pm | Permalink

      But if everyone stops projecting negativity at the hurricane, it will lose all strength and just fade away in a swath of rainbows. It’s just that if even one person fails to be positive, then that cancels out everyone else’s efforts.

      Wishful thinking at its finest. Look where it’s gotten her so far.

  4. coozoe
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:37 pm | Permalink

    There is nothing “natural” about Lohan. Not even remotely. She does so many substances, you’ll never get a single lucid comment from her.

  5. Secularjew
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:38 pm | Permalink

    “Pray for peace”? I didn’t realize we were at war with the hurricane.

    • Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:35 pm | Permalink

      Of course we are at war with these intrusive and disruptive storms. We are at war with the damnable climate and the goofy scientists that make up these storms. So just pray for peace, if you don’t know how, take 2 Xanax 4 Oxys followed by 2 shots of Tequila and bend your head toward the porcelain god and beg Ceiling Cat for an end to the Lohan’s of the world.

      • Dermot C
        Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:15 pm | Permalink

        How fabtastically southern USA of you, Miss Texas Kitty, or can I call you erm… Mistek for short? Over here in the UK, we’d just order 9 brown ‘n’ milds and get completely bladdered, as the Auld Empire crumbles beneath our wambling feet. How I sometimes envy you Amer’cuns and your epic land.

    • Posted October 29, 2012 at 10:48 pm | Permalink

      No but we are able to influence the hurricane by writing messages for it on the plywood we screw to our houses (if we live on the US Eastern seaboard at least, it seems). The hurrican can see and read English.

  6. Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:45 pm | Permalink

    It’s not as though she could have tweeted otherwise!

    • Notagod
      Posted October 30, 2012 at 7:51 am | Permalink

      Though, after reading the comments here she could chirp differently next time.

  7. abrotherhoodofman
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:54 pm | Permalink

    I rather like Lindsay Lohan’s projections.

    *rimshot*

  8. Dermot C
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 2:57 pm | Permalink

    Seriously, I hope you’re all OK on the eastern seaboard; this is all very stiff upper lip – an American coinage, apparently.

    Cheers.

  9. Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:05 pm | Permalink

    It is easy to feel safe when you are not in the area of influence of a hurricane.
    And it is a pity that those half a hundred DEAD were not positive enough and did not pray for PEACE???

  10. Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:08 pm | Permalink

    People like this should have their mouths taped shut. Chincotesgue Island is now under water and the storm hasn’t even merged with that cold front yet.

    • MaryL
      Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:21 pm | Permalink

      How’s Assateague and the ponies? So sorry to hear about Chincoteague. I’m from Maryland.

      • Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:41 pm | Permalink

        Ooh, my thoughts for your region. I’m from Mass but I think the ponies may be okay, auctioneers (sadly) force them to swim every year if I remember right. Plus it’s only 3 feet of water right now. I hope everyone, human and critter, survives the night.

        • Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:43 pm | Permalink

          Three feet of water might not sound like much, but if it’s three feet of storm-driven ice-cold Atlantic sea water….

          b&

          • Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:12 pm | Permalink

            Yep, of course. But I’m sure it’s not the first severe storm the wildlife have seen there. There’s a good chance many of the ponies will make it.

            • microraptor
              Posted October 31, 2012 at 10:54 pm | Permalink

              Isn’t Assateague a much bigger island than Chincoteague?

    • Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:32 pm | Permalink

      Better to bind her hands… 

      /@

  11. Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:09 pm | Permalink

    Nice spelling, f*****ing iPad.

    • Posted October 30, 2012 at 5:22 am | Permalink

      Turn off the predictive text you Mormon

      • Posted October 30, 2012 at 5:22 am | Permalink

        Sorry, ‘moron’. Damn this predictive text.

        • Posted October 30, 2012 at 6:35 am | Permalink

          *Snort good one, Wheatgrass.

          By the way it was my crappy typing not the predictive text but my temper dictates I blame the keypad. Get it? Unless Chinotesgue is a real word…….

          • Posted October 30, 2012 at 8:49 am | Permalink

            Unless Chinotesgue is a real word…….

            It actually is. It’s the Pima word for…well, actually, I’m afraid Jerry would get rather upset if I told you what it means….

            b&

  12. Sastra
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:24 pm | Permalink

    I like how she combines New Age/ New Thought prattle with a more conventional call for prayer. You can always fit one form of nonsense with another. Progress in spirituality. So empowering.

  13. Hempenstein
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:22 pm | Permalink

    Further cluelessness, overheard yesterday @ a Home Depot in Pittsburgh: A guy buying a portable generator wanted help with the delivery… to his second floor apartment!

  14. jeffery
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 4:52 pm | Permalink

    The U.S. is getting pummeled by this massive storm (which is sweeping through New York City, that den of iniquity, by the way) because of our continued refusal to stone to death all homosexuals and apostates, and also because Barack Obama hasn’t just gone ahead and conceded the election to Mittens! Prayze Jeebus!

    • Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:19 pm | Permalink

      Actually, you see, Poseidon is a Tigers fan. He was aiming for San Francisco, but you know how these gods get in their dotage….

      b&

      • Dermot C
        Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:39 pm | Permalink

        Ben,

        There’s an interpretation of the fall of Troy that Poseidon done for ‘em, Can’t remember the exact story, but not only was he the god of the seas but also that he was Theo of earthquakes: the walls fell because of a quake; ergo, the Greek myth is a fictional reinterpretation of a natural disaster. Wooden horse = the white horses of huge waves – geddit? Though whether the metaphor is 3,200 years old, I don’t know.

        Prof. Eric Cline, I think, is the go-to man on this story.

        • Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:53 pm | Permalink

          See? That’s what so great about the old gods.

          They had character.

          They had substance.

          They had spirit.

          These new gods? Bah! Not even fit to empty Aphrodite’s chamber pot. Ground of all being? More like ground of all round.

          Cheers,

          b&

  15. MaryL
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:19 pm | Permalink

    I live in Florida now, but my heart stays in MD. Yes, the Chincoteague ponies are a tough breed; just had to ask. True, the herd is culled yearly; the auction traditionally benefits the Fire Department. A secondary benefit is to the ponies; Assateague can support only so many; food is provided when needed (in a draught, for instance); vets check the herd, too. This all costs money. The ponies swim over, with supervision. It’s not a perfect world.

  16. suwise3
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:24 pm | Permalink

    Nothing to worry about- Romney’s got this. He’s suspending his campaign to deliver aid: “Mitt Romney’s campaign will use a campaign bus to help deliver supplies to those affected by Hurricane Sandy, Breitbart.com reported.”

    • Posted October 29, 2012 at 5:31 pm | Permalink

      Wow. That’s like, almost as effective as his proposal for funding student expenses for higher education.

      A whole campaign bus full of supplies! That’ll do just so much good.

      Except…is there any room in there, what with all the binders full of women? Might have to make an extra trip.

      b&

    • Filippo
      Posted October 30, 2012 at 3:30 am | Permalink

      Have just heard on NPR Romney say, ” . . . hopefully your [rally attendees'] prayers will join with mine . . . .” [on behalf of those USians who are affected by the storm - as if no one has been affected by the storm prior to U.S. landfall].

      Re: Dawkins’s comment about Pope John Paul II’s comment to the effect the Lady of Fatima (?) guided the bullet to a less critical area of the Pope’s body; why not cause it to entirely miss? So with the hurricane and prayer.

      Has some prominent conservative religious bloviator already held forth for public consumption that the hurricane is some sort of punishment/retribution for the U.S.?

    • microraptor
      Posted October 31, 2012 at 11:03 pm | Permalink

      Don’t worry.

      One of the things Mittens has promised to do is cut funding to FEMA and pass its job on to the so much better prepared state and local governments, which will insure that we don’t get another disaster like this again.

  17. JohnnieCanuck
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 7:33 pm | Permalink

    How many people are going to die because they weren’t paying attention in their science classes? Generators produce CO which produces sleepiness and death.

  18. Deb T
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 7:46 pm | Permalink

    Lindsay who?

  19. John
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    But she’s hot, so she gets a pass for anything she says. :)

    • Posted October 30, 2012 at 8:47 am | Permalink

      I admit, I really had no clue who she was aside from being one of those endless supply of young women famous for having made a sex tape while being famous (or whatever it is that she’s famous for).

      I just did a Google Images search for her…and meh. Too plastic. Something tells me she’s not very attractive without her mask on, and not very pleasant to actually be around.

      Truly beautiful women are still gorgeous when they get out of bed in the morning. I very much doubt that that applies in this case.

      b&

  20. Beachscriber
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 11:11 pm | Permalink

    I don’t understand the panic either. I’m getting my surfboard out.

  21. Katkinkate
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 2:32 am | Permalink

    Beachscriber, cyclone waves are very messy. Hope you’re a strong swimmer. Might want to wear a life jacket.

  22. Filippo
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 3:18 am | Permalink

    I gather that Ms. Lohan has recently arrived at the point that she has such firm control over the at arm’s-length circumstances of her own life that she is now positioned to competently hold forth on planetary events.

    • microraptor
      Posted October 31, 2012 at 10:59 pm | Permalink

      I’m just amazed that she’s gained sufficient levels of realization that she understands that things can occur outside of her direct line of sight.

  23. Ed L
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 7:09 am | Permalink

    Have no fear; Lindsay Lohan is here.

  24. TJR
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 7:09 am | Permalink

    How utterly outrageous.

    What a completely moronic comment.

    It’s “think positively” you buffoon!

  25. Notagod
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 8:10 am | Permalink

    Lindsey makes me so mad! These type of storms are caused by people not eating enough Jesus Christ. Praying only works if the quota of Jesus Christ eating has been met.

    • Posted October 30, 2012 at 8:52 am | Permalink

      I had bacon for breakfast this morning. Does that count?

      It was rather good bacon, too — overpriced cherrywood-smoked uncured bacon from Whole Paycheck.

      If not, I’m sure I could find some cheesy crisps at the local stop-and-rob, though I don’t like those things. Would it really make a difference?

      b&

      • Notagod
        Posted October 30, 2012 at 9:13 am | Permalink

        Must of had some Jesus Crispy Christ residue remaining on the cutting blades, yes, it seems to be helping a bit.

  26. Gabrielle Guichard
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 10:01 am | Permalink

    Is it real? I mean, it sounds like a joke. Not a good one, but not something one can say seriously.


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