Texas officially the dumbest state in the Union

Well, that’s true if you judge from the 2012 Texas Republican party platform. Granted, party platforms aren’t usually turned into legislation, but they’re meant to appeal to voters.  What appeals to Texas Republicans?  This, from page 12 of the document:

Knowledge-Based Education – We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs that are simply a relabeling of Outcome-Based Education (OBE) (mastery learning) which focus on behavior modification and have the purpose of challenging the student’s fixed beliefs and undermining parental authority.

Nope, wouldn’t want to do that.  There’s more:

Protection from Extreme Environmentalists – We strongly oppose all efforts of the extreme environmental groups that stymie legitimate business interests. We strongly oppose those efforts that attempt to use the environmental causes to purposefully disrupt and stop those interests within the oil and gas industry. We strongly support the immediate repeal of the Endangered Species Act. We strongly oppose the listing of the dune sage brush lizard either as a threatened or an endangered species. We believe the Environmental Protection Agency should be abolished.

Nutcases!  Do they think the End Times are nigh?

Religious Symbols – We oppose any governmental action to restrict, prohibit, or remove public display of the Decalogue or other religious symbols.

Religious Freedom in Public Schools – We urge school administrators and officials to inform Texas school students specifically of their First Amendment rights to pray and engage in religious speech, individually or in groups, on school property without government interference. We urge the Legislature to end censorship of discussion of religion in our founding documents and encourage discussing those documents.

There goes the First Amendment. . .

Homosexuality ― We affirm that the practice of homosexuality tears at the fabric of society and contributes to the breakdown of the family unit. Homosexual behavior is contrary to the fundamental, unchanging truths that have been ordained by God, recognized by our country’s founders, and shared by the majority of Texans. Homosexuality must not be presented as an acceptable “alternative” lifestyle, in public policy, nor should “family” be redefined to include homosexual “couples.” We believe there should be no granting of special legal entitlements or creation of special status for homosexual behavior, regardless of state of origin. Additionally, we oppose any criminal or civil penalties against those who oppose homosexuality out of faith, conviction or belief in traditional values.

Gays aren’t asking for “special status”: they’re asking for the same status as heterosexual couples and individuals.  And the part about “opposing criminal and civil penalties against those who oppose homosexuality out of faith, etc.” worries me. Of course it should be legal to oppose and criticize homosexuality—that’s just free speech—but I have a feeling something else is behind that statement.

There’s a lot more along these lines, but I can’t go on. It’s too embarrassing to think of how other countries see this stuff.

135 Comments

  1. DV
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:38 am | Permalink

    OMG they’re stoopid and proud of it.

    • MadScientist
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:19 pm | Permalink

      It’s a new level of stoopid too – it makes Markuze look sane and The Onion look real. A huge section of the document is about keeping Teh Gayz in their place in society (which is Not In My State of course), an equally large section on the Vagina Police, and a Foreign Relations section which more or less declares war on the rest of the world – except for Israel of course because the Jews have got to be saved, resulting in their magical conversion to Jesus and the advent of the End Times (well, they don’t say that explicitly but that’s exactly what they mean). Anyway, I’m glad that foreign relations is the sole domain of the Federal government (though I’m not terribly happy with the Dep. of State’s performance either – sometimes I think we should give ‘em their old name back – Dep. of War).

      • Jeff D
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:26 pm | Permalink

        But wasn’t it the Defense Department that used to be the Department of War?

        • E.A. Blair
          Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:51 pm | Permalink

          The Department of State is the oldest of the cabinet-level departments. The Department of War was created shortly thereafter, and existed from 1789 to 1947. It was then split into separate departments for the Army and Air Force, and were rejoined and added to the Department of the Navy to form the Department of Defense in 1949. Some hawkish politicians objected to the new name, saying that wars couldn’t be won from a defensive position.

          The reorganization of the Department of War did not, however, disrupt the order of succession to the presidency for cabinet-level officials, whose place in that line is determined by the date their department was created, from oldest to newest.

  2. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:38 am | Permalink

    Reblogged this on Fitnessgroan's Blog and commented:
    This has nothing to do with fitness, but I can’t resist…

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:34 am | Permalink

      Well, now, there’s a state to avoid raising your kids in — at least if you want them to go to college!

      • bakslider
        Posted July 10, 2012 at 1:15 pm | Permalink

        Wrong! Texas is the only state where higher education offers a Master’s program for Creation Science. You may not have to go to college but a couple hours online at Liberty University should getcha certified.

        If you are not scientifically inclined, it won’t be long before you can become a certified unicorn breeder.

  3. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:38 am | Permalink

    And that’s not the only proof; take a few seconds to read some of the other positions expressed.

    Get a barf bag ready first.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:48 am | Permalink

      I must, however, admit to one bit of doubt about the platform authenticity of statement: the URL is what gives me that doubt. Look at it closely.

      • Rob
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:58 am | Permalink

        The link matches the one on this page:

        http://www.texasgop.org/about-the-party

        • GD Lovechild
          Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:39 pm | Permalink

          Just found the 2010 platform here:

          http://s3.amazonaws.com/texasgop_pre/assets/original/2010RPTFinalPlatform.pdf

          The 2012 platform seems to be a complete reversal from just 2 years ago:

          “Knowledge-Based Education – The primary purpose of public schools is to teach critical thinking skills, reading, writing, arithmetic, phonics, history, science, and character as well as knowledge-based education, not job training. We support knowledge-based curriculum standards and tests. We support successful career and technology programs, but oppose mandatory career training. We oppose Outcome-Based Education (OBE) and similar programs. Further, because of an aging U.S. population and global competition, and because much of today’s education teaches children to be employees or perhaps at best managers for employers, we encourage the teaching of entrepreneurial skills and investment skills.”

          Perhaps they used the same critical thinking to realize that critical thinking was ultimately detrimental to their agenda.

          • RF
            Posted July 2, 2012 at 3:18 pm | Permalink

            How is that a reversal? I think you’re having trouble with reading comprehension.

  4. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:46 am | Permalink

    “We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs ”

    I appreciate the honesty though . . .

    • Grania Spingies
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:29 am | Permalink

      We’ve known all along that they aren’t in favor of an informed electorate, but I am staggered that they would be so blatant about it.

      The GOP must have nothing but contempt for its supporters.

      • Tim
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:11 pm | Permalink

        No. The supportes of the Texas GOP have nothing but contempt for education and intellectuals.

      • E.A. Blair
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 4:47 pm | Permalink

        Could it be that we’ve finally found some Republicans who are too stupid to lie about their agenda?

        • Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:24 am | Permalink

          Maybe the problem will eventually solve itself, then.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:44 am | Permalink

      I’m afraid you’re mistaking extreme ignorance for honesty.

    • Sigh
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:04 pm | Permalink

      Texas must be heaven (for con artists)!

    • RF
      Posted July 2, 2012 at 3:21 pm | Permalink

      ““We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs ”

      I appreciate the honesty though . . .”

      Apparently, you don’t appreciate honesty enough to practice it yourself. You’ve cut off the rest of that sentence: “critical thinking skills and similar programs that are simply a relabeling of Outcome-Based Education (OBE)…”

  5. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:48 am | Permalink

    Oh, also, “We affirm that the practice of homosexuality tears at the fabric of society and contributes to the breakdown of the family unit.”

    I’d appreciate it if the ‘smaller government’ people would stop thinking about my family ‘unit’. It’s a bit creepy. Perhaps some kind of harassment policy imbroglio could come out of this . . . it’s all the rage.

    • Paul S
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:23 pm | Permalink

      I’m curious, if marriage has been ordained by god; wouldn’t that mean it is inherently religious? If that is true, then doesn’t the first amendment prohibit the government from declaring that religious marriages present a legally binding contract or from making any laws or granting privileges based on a person’s religion or lack thereof? It seems to me that if you want to claim legal rights and privileges as a couple you must be joined in a civil union, not a religious ceremony. Perhaps I’ll write my congressman. Never mind, Mark Kirk is my senator and he’s a (R)epublican.

      • RFW
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:51 pm | Permalink

        There’s a subtle detail buried in your posting. The government does not recognize religious marriages. It only recognizes civil marriages for which the necessary paperwork is done.

        But! (really big but) Clergymen are generally allowed to handle that paperwork in conjunction with religious marriages they solemnize. IOW, when it comes to marriage, clergy wear two hats, one religious, one civil, as a matter of convenience.

        There are other systems. In France the state takes no cognizance of religious marriages. The happy couple first has their civil marriage solemnized at the mairie or hôtel de ville (city hall), then toddles off to church to have it solemnized in the religious sense, if they so wish.

        In Canada, the difference from the US system is much smaller. It’s a feature of Canadian church weddings that at one point, the entire weddding party disappears back into the rectory to “sign the register”; that is, to take care of the civil paperwork. (Many couples take advantage of the break to have a stiff drink with their wedding party.) Meanwhile, the organist uses the dead time to noodle away, perhaps inflicting on those assembled the latest work added to his repertoire.

        None of this is entirely strange in the US. Any marriage by a JP, for example, is strictly a civil marriage. AND EVERYONE KNOWS THAT!

        To pretend that all marriages have a religious component is just another lie by the hate industry.

        • Paul S
          Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:34 pm | Permalink

          My apologies for any unintended offense by not make my sarcasm clear. It is unfortunately my kneejerk reaction when I read hateful crap like this and realize that these people are serious. I was only responding to what I saw as Texas’ apparent claim that marriage was inherently religious so LGBTQ need not apply. My wife and I were married by a JP at the lovely Markham courthouse in Chicago’s south burbs and it was a wonder civil ceremony.
          I’m beginning to like France more and more

        • Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:34 pm | Permalink

          “The happy couple first has their civil marriage solemnized at the mairie or hôtel de ville (city hall), then toddles off to church to have it solemnized in the religious sense, if they so wish.”

          Somehow my ‘flu-blurred vision accidentally read “sodomized” rather than “solemnized”…

          • FastLane
            Posted June 29, 2012 at 7:47 am | Permalink

            Only if you go to the right church….

  6. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:49 am | Permalink

    It’s not a “special legal entitlement” when someone has the same rights you currently enjoy.

    • Achrachno
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:16 am | Permalink

      It is if you think your opinions should be controlling and that other someone should just do what you say.

      Why should someone get the special legal entitlement to run their own life when that right should reside only with me?

  7. Frank
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:53 am | Permalink

    This helps to explain how the state could elect a governor whose stupidity became all too apparent, even to Republican primary voters.

    • Claimthehighground
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 6:59 am | Permalink

      Ah, which one are we talking about? The incumbent or the one who made it all the way to the white house. No matter. Point taken.

    • Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:48 pm | Permalink

      Come on, get real. Compared to everybody else in Texas, he was an intellectual colossus.

  8. truthspeaker
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:00 am | Permalink

    Funny, I thought challenging students’ fixed beliefs was the whole point of education.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:02 am | Permalink

      For more information and good chuckles, look up Richard Dawkins’ speech starting off ‘be it resolved . . .’

  9. daveau
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:02 am | Permalink

    “…and have the purpose of challenging the student’s fixed beliefs and undermining parental authority.”

    So why send them to school at all? It would reduce the risk of them accidentally running into a homosexual or something equally horrifying, like a little bit of knowledge. Oh, I forgot, they don’t have either of those in Texas.

    • daveau
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:12 am | Permalink

      Although I totally see why they want to display the Decalogue.

  10. E.A. Blair
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:08 am | Permalink

    Tell me again why we fought that war to bring them back in to the Union? Can we kick then back out?

    • E.A. Blair
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:26 am | Permalink

      Typo apology: “then” should have been “them”

    • truthspeaker
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:16 pm | Permalink

      Cattle and access to California.

    • pulseteresa
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:54 pm | Permalink

      What about all of the rational people in Texas? Austin is well known to be very liberal and secular as are plenty of other areas and individuals I’m sure. They’re the victims. And it’s not so easy to just up and move.

      Still, I understand your point (and that you’re at least partially joking). I had a friend who years ago said that we should never have allowed any of the Confederate states back into the Union, but instead kept them as “subject states” (I’m not sure what he meant by subject states).

      • gluonspring
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:24 pm | Permalink

        Austin is a nice place, but they get too much credit as the only civilized part of Texas. Houston, as I mentioned in another comment, has elected an openly gay mayor, the largest city in the U.S. to do so. Apparently the citizens of Houston didn’t get the memo that homosexuality tears at the fabric of society.

        • HUD5ON
          Posted July 9, 2012 at 6:14 am | Permalink

          Actually she won because her opponent decided to attack her for being gay. In true Democratic style, she answered. “I am gay but my opponent is a lawyer.”

  11. Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:16 am | Permalink

    I knew it! But to actually hear it from their own mouths…What’s the date? This isn’t some overdue April fool’s joke, is it?

  12. gbjames
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:19 am | Permalink

    These people are in control of many of our states, to say nothing of the US Congress.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:15 pm | Permalink

      Not to mention the US public education system (in how textbook editions / purchases are negotiated).

      • Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:16 pm | Permalink

        …or actually… to mention it. I just mentioned it. (what a weird phrase “not to mention…”)

        • daveau
          Posted June 28, 2012 at 2:28 pm | Permalink

          Well, now that you mention it…

          • E.A. Blair
            Posted June 28, 2012 at 2:46 pm | Permalink

            Or not mention it, as the case may be…

            • Posted June 28, 2012 at 4:56 pm | Permalink

              You don’t say…

              • E.A. Blair
                Posted June 28, 2012 at 5:39 pm | Permalink

                Say what?

              • Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:39 pm | Permalink

                I’mma do what I’mma do, I’mma say what I’mma say
                Ya understand what I’m saying?
                Well you better

                — R. Kelly

  13. Kirth Gersen
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:32 am | Permalink

    What’s even worse is that, because of the electoral college, anyone stuck living here in TX is automatically one vote tallied in favor of that platform. For a non-republican to win any major office in Texas (governor, presidential candidate) is less likely than religion disappearing tomorrow.

    • E.A. Blair
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:52 pm | Permalink

      It looks like Howard Alan Treesong wrote that platform.

      • Kirth Gersen
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 11:47 am | Permalink

        Numerical conspiracy woo follows:
        “Howard Alan Treesong” has 18 letters; 1 + 8 = 9. “Rick Perry” has 9 letters. Coincidence?

        P.S. Unlike my namesake, I’d prefer a less drastic solution than marmelizing people.

    • gluonspring
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:01 pm | Permalink

      Take heart, you are not alone.

      3.5 million people in Texas voted for Barack Obama (vs 4.4 million for McCain). That’s 43.8% of the state. To put this quantity of people into perspective, that’s more people in Texas who actually went to the polls and cast a vote for the Democratic candidate than the total population of 20 of the states. 2.5 million voted for Al Gore (vs 3.7 million for Texan candidate, GW Bush). And Bill Clinton was a quite close case, losing both times, but with 2.2 million vs 2.4 million and 2.5 million vs 2.7 million.

      I assume that basically none of those millions of Obama/Gore/Kerry/Clinton people agree with the GOP platform.

      • Steve Wagner
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:05 am | Permalink

        Clinton has spent a good number of years since his presidency paling around with both George Bush I and George Bush II, so you do have to wonder. [You know, that "birds of a feather" thing].

  14. Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:33 am | Permalink

    This is one of the rare moments where I am happy I am in Canada.

    • normw
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 2:59 pm | Permalink

      Why rare? :)

  15. Darth Dog
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:34 am | Permalink

    One of my favorite lines in Dr. Strangelove has always been “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here. This is the War Room.”

    Now we can replace it in Texas with “Kids, you can’t think in here. This is a school.”

    • JonLynnHarvey
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:45 pm | Permalink

      LOL

    • Occam
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 2:25 pm | Permalink

      Speaking of Dr. Strangelove:
      The Texas Republican Party has just officially voted for…
      w a r with C h i n a.

      Last item, page 30:

      Taiwan – We support full diplomatic recognition of Taiwan as an independent and sovereign nation.

      Admirable sentiments, no doubt, but, as any diplomat whose head is not stuck up his rectum will tell you, this action would immediately provoke the most inimical reaction from China, which has long defined such a stance as a casus belli. It would run counter to the last forty years of diplomatic relations with China, all the way back to the Shanghai Communiqué of 1972, whereby the US acknowledged the One-China-policy in all its brilliant ambiguity.

      Suddenly, Dr. Strangelove is looking like a prudent moderate.

      • Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:30 am | Permalink

        I think that’s the point. Why would they give a damn about Taiwan? Because it’s a convenient excuse to stop teh ebil chinese from Taking Over The World.

        • Occam
          Posted June 29, 2012 at 1:05 am | Permalink

          …which, of course, they already have.
          Were the Chinese to cease underwriting US debts and withdraw their funds, the US economy would deflate like a cheap beach toy.
          Oops! It already has? Thanks to Republican improvidence and comatose economic concepts? Then what are the Republicans trying to bring about? Apocalypse Now?

      • RF
        Posted July 2, 2012 at 3:27 pm | Permalink

        If it provokes China into war, then it will be China that goes to war. Refusing to kowtow to other countries is not “voting for war”, and it’s rather disgusting that you are suggesting that if China were to go to war over us recognizing Taiwan, it would be our fault.

  16. Taki
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:38 am | Permalink

    The section for “opposing criminal and civil penalties against those who oppose homosexuality out of faith, etc.” is partly a reiteration of being opposed to Hate Crime laws that would have special penalties for crimes motivated by prejudice. In addition, it reminds me of the groups that added religious exemptions to anti-bullying laws, so that kids are free to bully gay kids because they’re just following their religion.

    I also can’t discount that a significant number of the people who drafted this would be fine with legalizing the assault or even murder of homosexuals.

  17. Alektorophile
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:41 am | Permalink

    I was going to say that the US would be better off if it returned Tejas to Mexico, but even with all its problems Mexico is a much saner country than Texas, and I doubt Mexico would want it if present occupants are included.

    • gluonspring
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 9:57 pm | Permalink

      “Tejas is the Caddo word for ‘Friend’. The Caddo were among the first to be wiped out by the White Man.” – Talking Heads, True Stories.

  18. Kirth Gersen
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:58 am | Permalink

    “We oppose any sex education other than abstinence until marriage.”

    In case anyone wondered why Texas has one of the highest rates of teen pregnancies in the nation…

  19. Paul Lyon
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:02 pm | Permalink

    How can we verify that this is legitimate? All my searching has just turned up articles with links to a PDF… is there an official republican site that links to it?

    • Paul Lyon
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:42 pm | Permalink

      Nevermind, someone else posted the link while I was awaiting moderation. :) Thanks Rob!

  20. Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:15 pm | Permalink

    oh my. It’s a shame that they are so afraid of their children being taught that their parents aren’t right all of the time.

    and if industry should have free reign and there should be no EPA, I’m sure that they would have no problem in exchanging houses with the people forced to lived near refineries, oil/gas wells since any NIMBY words leaving their lips would be sheer hypocrisy.

    As for religious symbols, it’s so cute to see them lie so poorly when they only mean Christian symbols. We know they don’t want the cresent and star around since that could mean Sharia law! And poor things, they obviously have no idea what the Constitution or the Amendments actually say. Poor poor wannabee martyrs that can’t force their religon on others. Oh say it ain’t so!

    Finally, it’s always good to see people “affirm” lies that they have no evidence to support. It’s so pleasing to see Christians bear false witness (oooh, that decalogue they’re so worried about, that they break it?), further lie about what the Founding Fathers thought, and I do love how they don’t want anyone held accountable for the harm that they would do to those who don’t agree with them. Anyone dragging anyone they don’t like behind a truck until dead would simply be showing their religious “freedom”. Always good to see such hatred and bigotry shown so forthrightly. At least we know who these assholes are by their own words.

  21. Dan
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:54 pm | Permalink

    I live in this state.. we aren’t all retards. Things like this DO make me wish I DIDN’T have to live around these backwards people. Republicans are spitud. Remember the Rick Perry’s I-hate-gays youtube vid? So do I, what an idiot. It’s not like I voted for him.

    • Dan
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:54 pm | Permalink

      BWAHAHAHA, mistyped stupid. lawls.

      • Achrachno
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:24 am | Permalink

        But you were still right. They are spitud as well.

    • gbjames
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:09 pm | Permalink

      I used to be able to feel superior to you folks in Texas. No more. Not since Scott Walker and his outfit took over Wisconsin. Serves me right, I suppose.

    • gluonspring
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:34 pm | Permalink

      Texas is often an embarrassment, but perhaps not quite as bad as some think. Most places in Texas have actual funding for schools, for example, in sharp contrast to the part of California where I live now where they beg parents for basic supplies (Of course, both states fall far below average in science education, so… blah). Similarly, I do not find many people who realize that Houston, a city of four million, has a large LGBT population and has elected an openly gay mayor. The largest city to ever have done so, I believe. No doubt this causes nightmares for the state GOP, and it likely shocks more conservative areas like Dallas. Among the ultra-conservative suburbs of Houston, like Sugar Land (where that lovely statesman Tom Delay hails from) it likely signals Armageddon. One possible reading of the GOP platform is as a hysterical reaction to things like this, to political and demographic trends that are aligned against them in the long run. I’m too much of a pessimist to really believe it, but there may be a thread of truth in it.

      Of course, the caricature of whole states works both ways. In Dallas, some of my relatives can not believe that there are conservatives in California. I marvel that they have not heard of Ronald Reagan or Proposition 8.

    • ColdThinker
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 6:25 am | Permalink

      But doesn’t the US voting system mean that your vote is automatically counted as republican and for e.g. Mitt Romney? So, by remaining a Texan and adding to the population and the number of electoral votes, you in effect do support this platform.

      • Kirth Gersen
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 11:53 am | Permalink

        Precisely so. Find me a comparable job in a Blue State (or in some more civilized country altogether) in this economy, and I shall leave Texas forthwith, never to return! Until then… one more electoral vote for Teh Krazy, while I submit hundreds of applications a year.

  22. Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:56 pm | Permalink

    How do we spell “Texas”?

    A-R-I-Z-O-N-A

  23. RFW
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:57 pm | Permalink

    “We oppose any governmental action to restrict, prohibit, or remove public display of the Decalogue or other religious symbols.”

    There are no barriers to the public display of religious symbols. If there were, churches wouldn’t be allowed to have crosses on their buildings. What’s _not_ permitted is their display on publicly owned property.

    As usual, the liars on the right engage in utterly illogical conflation of different things. Poor oppressed xtians!

  24. MadScientist
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:05 pm | Permalink

    “Knowledge-Based Education” of course is Jesus code for “Ignorant Bible-Based Bullshit Substituted for Education”

    “Religious Freedom” means “Institution of Religion by Government”.

    Historical revision wasn’t enough – now they invent meanings for phrases. Did the Tx GOP have a meeting and go “Golly, we gotta out-stupid that Bobby Jindal!”

  25. shakyisles
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:14 pm | Permalink

    Every country has their national embarrassments. In NZ ours is allowing the Best of Blenheim, who raped and tortured 16 women, out of jail after 21 years. In Texas he’d be bacon by now

    • shakyisles
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:15 pm | Permalink

      *Beast of Blenheim

      • daveau
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 2:24 pm | Permalink

        Freud would be proud!

    • gbjames
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:17 pm | Permalink

      No, in Texas some other guy (probably black) would be bacon by now.

  26. Pray Hard
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:16 pm | Permalink

    OK, it’s final. I’m moving to New Mexico. I feel so retarded. Must be the heat.

  27. Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:18 pm | Permalink

    I’m assuming this was submitted in orange wax crayon with all the R’s backwards then?

    • Claimthehighground
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 7:10 am | Permalink

      with lots of underlining, and random capitalization, too.

  28. Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:45 pm | Permalink

    Protection from Extreme Environmentalists – We strongly oppose all efforts of the extreme environmental groups that stymie legitimate business interests. We strongly oppose those efforts that attempt to use the environmental causes to purposefully disrupt and stop those interests within the oil and gas industry. We strongly support the immediate repeal of the Endangered Species Act. We strongly oppose the listing of the dune sage brush lizard either as a threatened or an endangered species. We believe the Environmental Protection Agency should be abolished.

    This almost reads like a parody. I come from a country where politicians specialize in “dontopedalogy”, but this wouldn’t pass muster even there.

  29. Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:51 pm | Permalink

    By the way, a slightly tangential note: on the birth centenary of Alan Turing (one of the founders of modern theory of computation, and World War II hero, among other things), Stanford (earlier Berkeley) theoretical computer scientist Luca Trevisan is running a list of accounts my gay members of the theoretical computer scientists. I was pleased to find they include some of the biggest names in the field. The blog can be found here: http://lucatrevisan.wordpress.com/
    (Look for Turing Centennial Posts).

    Perhaps the people who wrote the section on “Homosexuality” quoted above might also benefit from reading the site.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:56 pm | Permalink

      “gay members of theoretical computer scientists” should be “gay members of the theoretical computer science community”, of course. Sorry for the unfortunate typo.

      • Lars
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

        An unfortunate typo, true, but an interesting image.

      • gluonspring
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:41 pm | Permalink

        An apology isn’t enough. I want blood! ;-)

  30. JonLynnHarvey
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 1:57 pm | Permalink

    I went to elementary school in Dallas Texas and was extremely glad to leave at the conclusion of 7th grade in 1968. (My final night in Dallas was spent seeing the opening night of “2001: A Space Odyssey” and I admit I viewed it as an allegory of leaving Texas.) Even then I could see there were widespread mental blocks in the culture against basic critical thinking.

    The only silver lining I can find here (and it’s damn thin) is “We urge the Legislature to end censorship of discussion of religion in our founding documents and encourage discussing those documents” and their suggestion to repeal the Patriot Act.

    However, even a clock that is stopped is correct twice a day.

    • ColdThinker
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 8:14 am | Permalink

      Whatever your reasons for leaving Texas, it was the ethical thing to do. Because the US electoral college system is what it is, all voters in Texas count as republicans and take part in endangering the planet. My cousin is doing business in Texas and an ex-acquintance in Saudi-Arabia, and for what it’s worth, I told them both I consider it dirty money and an unethical life choice to support such societies.

  31. Caroline52
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:04 pm | Permalink

    It’s also anti-rational to insist on referring to homosexuality as a “lifestyle choice,” these days, when everyone has access to the information that no one “chooses” to be homosexual or heterosexual. It’s no different from saying that being black “isn’t an acceptable lifestyle choice.” — or that “being female,”isn’t. People aren’t entitled to base public policy on made-up facts. Their position on marriage equality is no different from their position on evolution. They don’t care about what’s true. There’s a name for that kind of mind Tate: “brainwashed.”

    • Caroline52
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:11 pm | Permalink

      …er, that is, mind state.

  32. Hempenstein
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:13 pm | Permalink

    Where’s Kinky Friedman when you need him?

    • Occam
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 4:15 pm | Permalink

      In El Paso.

  33. Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:20 pm | Permalink

    “And we believe that Judgement Day
    Is coming with all haste,
    And anything that we don’t use
    Will then have gone to waste!

    Have a nice day, have a nice day,
    God loves you and he hopes you’ll
    Have a nice day!”

    Mark Graham, “Natural Selections”
    (Great folk music album, unfortunately OOP)

  34. emmageraln
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:20 pm | Permalink

    Reblogged this on emmageraln.

  35. emmageraln
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:22 pm | Permalink

    Reblogged this on emmageraln.

  36. JonLynnHarvey
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:55 pm | Permalink

    Oh, Lordy.
    They say that America is founded on Judeo-Christian principles!!

    They obviously haven’t read the 1796 Treaty of Tripoli lately which overtly states that “in no way is the United States founded on the Christian religion”.

    The closest you can get to supporting evidence for this is that a lot of the founding fathers were influenced by John Locke who considered himself a Christian. But Locke did not believe in the divinity of Jesus, and a close examination of his book “The Reasonableness of Christianity” shows his beliefs were far removed from that of Texas fundamentalists.

    They also have that old canard of teaching the “strengths and weaknesses” of “scientific theories”. Richard Dawkins once said, Of course teach the case against evolution. You’d be done in one minute. There isn’t any.

  37. Steve Wagner
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:20 pm | Permalink

    Yet another reason to go to any of the other 49 first.

    • gluonspring
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:34 pm | Permalink

      Really? Alabama? Mississippi?

      • Steve Wagner
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:09 am | Permalink

        People in Alabama and Mississippi may be dumb as a box of rocks, too, but the Texas Republic is just so big they seem tame by comparison.

  38. PeteJohn
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:08 pm | Permalink

    I commented about this over at Aron Ra’s new blog. I concluded that the idiocy would be deeply hilarious if it weren’t so frightening. This isn’t some breakaway renegade fifth party, this is the GOP, (probably, I’m not from Texas so I’m just guessing) the larger and more powerful and better-funded of the two parties in one of the largest states in the United States. One that, because of it’s sheer size and textbook-buying policy, literally controls the textbook market in the United States. It’s a little sickening if you think about it.

  39. barael
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:25 am | Permalink

    That secession talk in Texas a few years back? Yeah, they shouldn’t be allowed to do that anymore. They shouldn’t be allowed to quit, they should just be fired.

    • Steve Wagner
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 1:09 am | Permalink

      As folk singer Phil Ochs said about Mississippi, “Find yourself another country to be part of.” Same goes for “The Texas Republic.”

  40. Sioux
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:27 am | Permalink

    Jerry said he couldn’t go on because ‘It’s too embarrassing to think of how other countries see this stuff.’ He needn’t have worried. I should point out as a reader from South Africa that I recognise a spoof when I see one. This is parody, right? Right? Please, say I’m right!

    • shakyisles
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 6:43 pm | Permalink

      +1

      It’s ironic to think that at primary school we would heartily sing ‘Deep in the Heart of Texas’ in Assembly, and dream about what a wonderous place it must be

  41. Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:12 am | Permalink

    The thing that concerned me most about Texas schools is the heavy use of criminal prosecution to control the students. PBS News showed a lot of cases where children were charged and given a criminal records for fighting, swearing, or violating dress codes. The criminal records are permanent, and they basically cripple the kids’ opportunities for the rest of their lives.

    Then, of course, we have the priority of expanding prisons while funding for schools is cut.

    Seems to me we have a prevailing logic (and I know almost half of Texans oppose this) that society is to be improved by weeding out the bad apples. Finally, only the most self-righteous will be left standing, and we won’t have to bother with counter-productive, supposedly non-biblical ideas such as forgiveness.

    • E.A. Blair
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:55 am | Permalink

      That’s a direct result of the privatization of prisons. It goes like this: Without an influx of new prisoners, prison profits go down. When prison profits go down, so do campaign contributions to politicians who support privatization. Most of those politicians are Republicans. Therefore, Republicans support criminalization of more and more types of behavior.

      There are a number of things that should never be left to the private sector, and the penal system is one.

      • Posted June 29, 2012 at 5:27 am | Permalink

        PBS interviewed school principals, and a judge in Houston who deals with hundreds of these cases. They said that without these penalties, the teachers would lose control. Are the kids actually put in privatized jails? Do the teachers and judges actually get kickbacks for putting kids there?

        • gbjames
          Posted June 29, 2012 at 5:29 am | Permalink

          Not so much the teachers.

          Here’s a handy explanation of how it works. This example is from Pennsylvania. It isn’t just a Texas thing.

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kids_for_cash_scandal

          • Brian Griffith
            Posted June 29, 2012 at 7:35 am | Permalink

            A priority on expanding prisons and child prosections over funding better schools reminds me of Pakistan. There, I hear that about 2% of the budget goes for public education, and around 70% goes for “defense.” Since the government doesn’t even offer schools in most places, the only schooling available in many areas is from the Saudi-funded fundamentalist religious schools. The students of such schools are called “Taliban,” or “religious students.” The government has money for fighting and killing the brainwashed grads of these schools, but nothing much for offering a better education alternative. And the Western nations are pressuring Pakistan to spend yet more on killing the graduates

      • shakyisles
        Posted June 29, 2012 at 6:45 pm | Permalink

        you just answered my question about whether there is a link there. I did see the doco and was shocked that these ‘bad’ kids are being used as a commercial commodity

    • RF
      Posted July 2, 2012 at 3:40 pm | Permalink

      DO you have a cite for this? As far as I know, juvenile records are sealed on reaching majority.

      • Posted July 2, 2012 at 5:17 pm | Permalink

        I hope you’re right. The Texan parents interviewed on the PBS evening news said their kids were given criminal records, which they were legally required to report on seeking a job or applying to a college or university.

        • Steve Wagner
          Posted July 2, 2012 at 9:01 pm | Permalink

          That sounds like the kind of brainwashing we used to be subjected to when I was a school kid long long ago: Things were going to “go into your record, and follow you for the rest of your life.” Right. I guess the technology is developing for such a thing to happen, but all that crap the school teachers and principals would clutter up our “records” with didn’t follow anybody anywhere.

        • RF
          Posted July 2, 2012 at 9:25 pm | Permalink

          My understanding is that juvenile courts often do not involve juries, on the justification that they aren’t “really” criminal trials. Seeing as how the Constitution says that criminal defendants must be offered a jury trial, it seems to me that if you’re found guilty in a process in which a jury trial is not an option, it’s perfectly legitimate to respond to the question “Have you ever been convicted of a crime?” with “no”. In fact, here in California, judges will specifically tell defendants who plead down to an infraction that they may so respond.

          • Posted July 3, 2012 at 4:42 am | Permalink

            So are we saying that in Texas, we’ve largely replaced sending kids to the principal’s office with sending kids to the police station? Is that just a higher-level slap on the wrist? Do other states turn over classroom disciple to the police?

            • Steve Wagner
              Posted July 3, 2012 at 7:02 pm | Permalink

              That does seem to be the mentality. On the other hand, reading about the Summer Moody murder case in Alabama that the government, in all it’s wisdom, refuses to prosecute, and especially the mean spirited comments people make after reading news stories about it, I have concluded that Alabama is running a close second to Texas as dumbest state in the nation. http://alnotes.com/summer-moodys-family-sues-over-teens-shooting-death-on-gravine-island/ My guess is Alabama has more whack-job Pentecostal snake handlers, too!

  42. Posted June 29, 2012 at 6:04 am | Permalink

    Reblogged this on TheBrabbleRabble and commented:
    Wow. God forbid they “challenge student’s fixed beliefs!”

  43. radek
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 7:40 am | Permalink

    Don’t be upset; it’s only a little bit better here in Poland ;)

    • ColdThinker
      Posted June 29, 2012 at 8:16 am | Permalink

      Funny, I just told someone that Poland is the Texas of Europe. But the cultural heritage is better.

  44. Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:26 pm | Permalink

    Is this an idea?

    http://ituna.org/texas.jpg

    • Mary - Canada
      Posted July 1, 2012 at 2:46 pm | Permalink

      +1!

  45. Coldthinker
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:28 pm | Permalink

    Ok. You have my sympathy. You have tried.

  46. Stephen Wilson
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 8:29 am | Permalink

    “We support objective teaching and equal treatment of all sides of scientific theories. We believe theories such as life origins and environmental change should be taught as challengeable scientific theories subject to change as new data is produced. Teachers and students should be able to discuss the strengths and weaknesses of these theories openly and without fear of retribution or discrimination of any kind.”

    Caught that one in there too at http://www.texasgop.org/about-the-party

  47. Herbie
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 12:34 pm | Permalink

    Eureka! Why hasn’t anyone thought of this before? Texas hast the largest area of any state in the lower 48 – over a quarter of a million square miles. The rest of us should just politely invite all conservatives to move there. We can create a foundation and raise money to help all non-conservatives already in Texas to move elsewhere. Once all of the right-wingers are bundled together, they can proceed, unrestrained, to do all of the things conservatives like to do. However, for lack of other convenient targets, they’ll have to do them to one another. They’ll eventually break themselves down into sub-groups, with each one hating all of the others. They’ll have an official state religious denomination (which will change with every election), and all others will be outlawed. All denominations will, of course, be staunchly based in the same conservative “christian” standards, like “Do unto others before they do unto you”, and “Blessed are the rich, for they will eventually inherit everything”. As they proceed to live their lives according to the conservative’s favorite rule (Darwinian survival of the fittest), the richest will be allowed to legally steal from the poorest, and the old and sick will be left to die from lack of health care, exposure to the elements, or hunger. Disputes will be settled by automatic weapons (the holder of the most expensive weapons wins). They’ll eventually find a “legal” reason to execute everyone with dark skin, but will eventually have to extend the extermination to other groups, like deeply-tanned people, or maybe those who are losing their hair, so as not to run out of their favorite source of entertainment. All executions will be televised, and will replace Monday night football, with professional cheerleaders and elaborate half-time shows. They’ll abolish education altogether, except for religion and target practice. Within a few generations there won’t be anyone who can fix a car or tie a shoe, but they’ll sure be able to quote a bible verse and shoot your eye out if you disagree with their interpretation. Rush Limbaugh will be on all radio and TV stations, and will be required listening for everyone 3-years-old and up. With all significant intellectual stimulation effectively removed, they will finally be able to really, truly relax, and let their mental faculties fully deteriorate into complete and comfortable non-awareness. It will be a true conservative paradise. Anyone want to help finance and ad campaign? Let’s get this movement underway!


4 Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. [...] Rather than do my own blog post on the idiocy of the Texas GOP’s official platform, I’ll direct you to this excellent post here documenting how religion does poison everything and makes people silly and afraid: http://whyevolutionistrue.wordpress.com/2012/06/28/texas-officially-the-dumbest-state-in-the-union/ [...]

  2. [...] Texas officially the dumbest state in the Union (whyevolutionistrue.wordpress.com) [...]

  3. [...] has always resisted the development of scientific knowledge. It should be no surprise that the Republican leadership of the State of Texas is absolutely opposed to the teaching of “higher order thinking [...]

  4. [...] vaccinations, and opposing sex education in schools. You can read discussions of this report here, here, and [...]

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